You Are Here

God's ways are not like our ways, of this there is no doubt. The harder pill to swallow, however, is that His timing is usually not like ours, either. I think that we are impatient creatures by nature and that patience does not occur naturally. None of us is born with it. It is a process - a fruit of the Spirit that must be nurtured and cultivated and, well, you get the idea.

Our culture has capitalized on this fact that we are impatient by nature and has carefully groomed us to expect instant everything. But the harsh reality is that we don't always get what we want, even if it is what God wants for us, when we want it.

In the four months since I have moved back to Austin, my idea of what my life would be like by now has pretty much shriveled up and died. My expectations have proven to be a bit unrealistic, although not necessarily by the world's standards, but by the standards adhered to when walking out what the Lord is leading you in - no matter how crazy it seems to yourself and everyone else.

Where I thought I would be by now is a tiny little speck on the horizon while I stand here in the middle of nowhere under a big red circle that reads, "You are here." Well, "here" is not where I want to be. I want to be "there." Waaaay over there. Now, please.

While I have spent much of the last several weeks feeling like I was spinning my wheels going absolutely NO-where, just waiting for something - anything - to bust open, I am beginning to catch a little glimpse of the "why" behind all this waiting. It's still a little fuzzy, but I am confident that the path that has been laid out before me will gradually come into focus as my "eyes" adjust.

Things are beginning to move slowly. Very slowly. I have been often frustrated in recent months because things were not happening as quickly as I thought they should. I have questioned whether or not I had heard God in pursuing the things I have been pursuing, and each and every time, I have ultimately returned to this one simple truth:

There is an illogical peace that resides deep in the soul of a child of God when she is standing dead center in the will of God for her life.

It makes no sense. Every circumstance swirling around her screams, “Worry – fear – dread!” But she quietly stands. The people around her question her actions and may eventually begin to believe that she has somehow missed the mark. There she is, standing alone. Her own thoughts and everything she has come to understand as what “should be” are shaken to the very core and pieces begin to crumble to the ground. She’s still standing.

This peace defies all reason and even makes her look like a fool. But it is the quiet confidence that is intravenously transmitted from the heart of the Almighty Himself directly into her spirit, and it is the very source of her strength and resolve to keep standing.

He sees the much larger picture of His plan for me than I will ever be able to comprehend or would even be able to carry if I saw it all now. This is where trust becomes something you can sink your teeth into. This is where faith brings you one step closer to spiritual adulthood, making the transition from child to woman or man. This is where your spirit becomes more intricately intertwined with that of the Creator. This is real - more real than anything else staring you in the face right now.

So keep standing. Keep your eyes fixed on the face of the One Who knows you best and loves you most. Your Deliverer is coming. He is standing by. You WILL see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

 "In quietness and trust is your strength..." 
Isaiah 30:15


"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness
of the LORD in the land of the living." 
Psalm 27:13

It Could Happen to Anyone

Today I'm taking a break from my usual subject matter to share with you an article published this week in the Town Messenger in Hutto, Texas.

Penned by Yours Truly, it is a true account of a recent experience I had involving my car, a camera, and a $75 ticket.

Enjoy. But not too much. :)

It Could Happen to Anyone - 

The Good News & Bad News of Getting Busted on Camera

by: Rachael Wilkins

It finally happened. I had heard of it happening to other people, but like so many other things we hear about, you don’t really believe it until it happens to you. And it happened to me. I always thought that if it did happen to me, it would happen in some big metro area, not in a little community like Hutto, TX. But here is where it did happen.
 

They say Hutto is a small town with big ideas, and that is precisely what popped into my head and out of my mouth when it happened.
 

“Hey! What’s the big idea?”
 

There I was, minding my own business, sorting through the mail - bill, bill, advertisement - when there it was. A letter from the City of Hutto addressed to yours truly.  “Hmmm, I wonder what they want?”
 

I slid my trusty letter opener along the top of the innocent-looking envelope, creating a nice, clean opening through which I pulled out the contents. I opened the “letter,” and there they were, staring me in the face – two full-color snapshots of my rear end. Okay, so it was my car’s rear-end, but now that I have your attention, let’s continue.
 

Now before you start thinking that I was flying down Highway 79 like a bat out of you-know-where, allow me to explain that when I committed the offense that got me busted on camera, I was making a right turn on a red light at Exchange Blvd, an act that, so far as I know, is perfectly legal. Apparently, however, I did not come to a complete stop before doing so. That, come to find out, is not so legal. 

For those of you who have found yourself in this same situation, I know you feel my pain. Thank you. For those of you who have not yet experienced that surreal moment when you see a full-color photo of your vehicle committing a no-no, accompanied by all the sordid details, don’t laugh. It could happen to you, too. And if it does, I have good news and bad news for you. Bad news first.

The bad news is that fighting a photo ticket is next to pointless for obvious reasons, and your little moment of carelessness (aka committing a ticketable offense) will cost you $75.00. 

The good news is that photo tickets do not count as moving violations, so they should not appear on your driving record or affect your insurance rates (or so says my attorney). 

The other “good” news is that if you do find yourself the recipient of a traffic ticket in Hutto (the photo variety or the old-fashioned kind), you can easily pay your fine online at the city’s website, HuttoTX.gov, from the comfort of your own home. I love technology.

But seriously, this little adventure has served me well as a reminder to pay closer attention when I am driving. It’s easy to get distracted and coast through a stop sign or fail to come to a complete stop when appropriate. I’m grateful for the fine job our Hutto Police Department does in keeping ours a safe community. But in the future, I will be more careful and keep that $75.00 in my pocket – at least until the next big shoe sale.

Not Forgotten

I have a confession to make. I love Amy Grant music. The old stuff. I guess it's mostly because it is part of the music I grew up on, and as much as I love current music, I do occasionally wax nostalgic and take great delight in listening to the songs that became the soundtrack of my life. Recently as I have been listening to Grant's The Collection, I have been hearing something in the lyrics of some of the songs that I have missed before.

If you are a singer, you know that there are particular songs, especially early on, that seem to generate requests for you to sing again and again. For me, one of those songs was El Shaddai, which I first sang at a little Assembly of God church in El Campo, Texas in my teens. As many times as I have listened to and sung this song, there was something that only became real to me today.

As I was driving to pick up my dog from the groomer, this song came on, and one line in particular struck me in a way it never has before. I relate on a more personal level to this line than I ever could have imagined when I was a young singer with visions of touching the masses with music that would move and inspire them.

The line that captured me was this: "...to the outcast on her knees, You were the God who really sees." Today for the first time when hearing this line, my mind immediately returned to a little bedroom in my parents' home in the months that my first marriage was ending, and the image of myself face-down on a tear-soaked carpet, pouring out my heart to a God I couldn't see, longing to be held by arms I couldn't feel.

In those agonizing months of coming to terms with rejection and betrayal, I learned to know Him on a deeper level than I had ever dreamed possible. He came to me, expressing His love for me in real and intimate ways that even now I have a difficult time expressing with mere words. I came to know that He saw every painful thing that had happened, and as He healed my heart, His voice became more familiar and precious to me than I had ever known before.

Today as I drove, I heard that same familiar voice speaking again to me - through me. Here is what He said:

"To the one whose heart has been battered by rejection and betrayal, to the one who has been cast aside, to the one who has been overlooked in search of someone or something else, to the one who feels the dull ache of dreams that seem too lofty to ever come true and the sting of criticism that makes their destiny seem unattainable, tell them this:

I have not forgotten you. You are mine. I have inscribed you on the palm of my hand, and your face is etched into my heart.The ones you thought would love you may have rejected you, but I have accepted you. The world may have cast you aside, but I have adopted you as My own. The world may have overlooked you, but I have called you by name, and you belong to Me. I want you to know the depths of My love for you, to commune with Me in sweet intimacy. When we spend time together, your destiny will become clear, and as you walk in all that I have laid out in My word and listen to and follow My voice, your destiny will be fulfilled in a more powerful way than you have ever dared to imagine."

"How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

       How vast is the sum of them!

Were I to count them,
       they would outnumber the grains of sand.
       When I awake, I am still with you."

Psalm 139:17-18